Low-cal chicken salad made in minutes

As I mentioned briefly in my post about losing the baby weight, I’m a devotee of the 5:2 or “Fast” diet. This means that 2 days a week, I only eat 500 calories all day (and then eat normally the rest of the week). I usually skip breakfast, then have a 200-cal lunch and a 300-cal dinner. You’d be surprised at how much food you can have for 300 calories!

My usually recipe guest poster, The Mum Recipes, is having a break this week. I wanted to share this super easy recipe I made the other day. I’m not normally the type to make up recipes, so I’m pretty proud of this!

The other night I wanted a quick, tasty, 300-calorie dinner for just me. I wanted to use leftovers from the roast chicken dinner we had the night before, and other random stuff I had lying around. I also wanted something with an exotic flavour. Here’s what I came up with…

You’ll need:

  • 1 skinless chicken breast. I used a leftover one from the roast chicken we had the night before. You could also use store-bought chicken pieces. If you want to cook it yourself, simmer in chicken stock from a stock cube for 8 minutes (make sure internal temp at least 70C), and then leave to rest while you assemble the rest of the salad.
  • a large handful of broccoli or other leftover green veg. I used broccoli from my roast dinner leftovers. You could use any green veg you have lying around, or just good old-fashioned lettuce.
  • 5 cherry tomatoes or half a normal tomato (if you’re watching calories, don’t overdo the tomatoes as they have a lot of natural sugar).
  • 1 spring onion or a sprinkling of normal onion (surprisingly, onions are high calorie – for veg – as well!)
  • About 2 inches of cucumber (get your mind out of the gutter)
  • 1 tsp fish sauce
  • 2 TB lime juice (from a jar is good)
  • 1 tsp toasted sesame oil
  • A sprinkling of chilli sauce if you fancy it. My fave is Cholula, but Tabasco or any other would do.

The method:

Use your hands to pull the chicken breast into thin strips, then throw it in your salad bowl.

Add your green veg. It’s best to have smallish bite-sized pieces so you don’t have to make much effort once you’re eating. You can also use your hands to pull your broccoli into smaller bitesize pieces. Other green veg could be chopped.

Halve the cherry tomatoes (or dice your larger tomato) and throw that in. Dice up the spring onion – chuck it in. Dice your cucumber. I like to slice the rounds and then cut those into four to make little triangles.

In a little bowl, vigorously stir together your fish sauce, lime juice and sesame oil. Then pour it over your salad and toss it up.

Sprinkle your chilli sauce on top if you’re into that sort of thing. You can also add salt & pepper, but fish sauce is already salty, so taste it first.

Credit: The salad dressing is a simplified adaptation from the ‘Szechuan Chicken’ recipe in The Fast Diet Recipe book.

Mummy in a Tutu

Behind the Blogging Scenes

I’m having a bit of a blog tag week. Earlier this week, I interviewed my husband for #TheDaddyTag challenge. Now I’m trying out ‘Behind the Blogging Scenes’. This one gives bloggers a chance to give their readers a glimpse at how they work behind the scenes.

Claire at The Pramshed did a great post answering the questions below, and she very kindly tagged me when I asked her to. I love answering questions about myself, lol. So here goes…

Where do you blog?

Usually sat on my sofa with my laptop while my husband watches some sport on the television, after the kids are in bed. Actually, since I’ve started blogging, I watch very little TV anymore as I’d always rather be doing something blog related! I’m trying to get some posts queued up ahead of time so I have more time when Strictly Come Dancing is on.

Where do you find inspiration for your blog posts?

Everywhere I can! I started the blog because I like writing my opinions of days out and holidays, along with tips for other people who want to do the same thing. Usually, I think of ways I might have organised a day out differently in order to make it more fun, and try to share those tips with my readers. I also get inspiration from other blogs, and I like sharing stories about my own life. My blog has ended up being more personal than I thought it would be before I started!

How long does it take you to write your blog posts?

Anywhere from 30 minutes to a couple hours. If it’s just me writing about my feelings or my past, it usually spills out pretty quickly. But if I’m trying to write something more factual, like this post on maternity rights, it takes me a lot longer to do the research. It also takes me longer if there are a lot of photos to sort out.

Do you plan your blog posts? How?

I’m still experimenting with how to schedule my posts across the week. I’m finding I like to post around 4 times a week. On Tuesday, I always post in my #blogtoast series, where I highlight a few other blogs that I really like. On Friday, my blogging partner “The Mum Recipes” always posts an easy family recipe. For the other two posts, I like one to be useful like a review or advice about something, and the other to be personal. But, if I fancy doing something different one week, I will – I don’t want to get too weighed down by routine.

What kind of camera do you use? What editing programme?

I’m not much of a photographer. I use my mobile phone to take photos. For editing, if it’s just cropping, I use Preview on my Mac. If the colours are wonky/it needs brightening up a bit, I use the auto touch-up on Google Photos. If some serious work needs to be done or an image created from scratch, I use Photoshop. I’m not great at Photoshop but I’m learning new bits of it all the time. I also like using the Prisma app for filters.

Do you use a notebook to track your ideas?

Nope. I usually write down my ideas and save them on draft status on WordPress. I started using the WordPress app to do this when I’m out and about – but I got burned doing that the other day. I was in the pub and had some (obviously incredibly brilliant) post ideas after a couple of pints. I accidentally published just the ideas with no content, which immediately went out to all my subscribers. From now on, I’ll use a simple notes app to track my ideas so I don’t accidentally publish too soon!

How do you take your pictures?

I just shoot from the hip, to be honest. I know that I should have brilliant photos to get the best engagement, but they’re just not the most important thing to me. I’m a words person. And I feel like if I take too many photos, it ruins my enjoyment of whatever I’m doing. I want to look through my eyes instead of the lens.

What’s your favourite type of blog post to write?

Ones that have the perfect intersection of something I’m passionate about with something I think other people will find useful.

Who knows about your blog?

I haven’t kept it a secret. I’m not good at keeping my own secrets. I probably bore most of my friends talking about it. But I haven’t shouted about it to some members of my extended family whom I think will disapprove. One of my posts got chosen for blog of the day on Mumsnet this week. I haven’t told my dad that more than a thousand people have read that story now!

Are you an organised or messy blogger?

I’m usually a super organised person, but I do tend to just do whatever I want with blogging. Whatever topic strikes my fancy, different linkys every week, different social media outlets. I just bounce around. I’ve read some great stuff about how to blog more productively, but I don’t want it to feel too much like a job.

Biggest blogging pet peeve?

Well obviously a big part of blogging is sharing stuff on social media. I dislike people (usually companies) that follow you only to get a follow back, and then unfollow soon after. You should follow people only if you’re interested in what they’re saying! I usually follow people back unless they are obvious spammers or have no profile info so I don’t know who they are. I also don’t understand why so many porn ladies follow me! They’re all like “hey come see my naked pics on Snapchat”. Does my twitter profile make me look like I like porn?

Please let me know in the comments if you want me to tag you to tell your own blogging behind the scenes story – I’ll invite you on Twitter and retweet you if you mention me in your post.

Diary of an imperfect mum

My taciturn husband takes #TheDaddyTag challenge

The Frenchie Mummy nominated me for her Daddy Tag Challenge, where us mummy bloggers get our daddy counterparts to answer some questions about being a daddy. My husband Paul is nearly monosyllabic lots of the time (except when I’m really busy writing – then he keeps talking at me). So this was an interesting challenge for us! Will it be interesting for you, though, dear reader? Only you can decide…

Are you a Stay at Home Daddy or a Working Daddy?

Working Daddy, but I work from home twice a week and do school/nursery runs those days.

Would you have it any other way?

I wish I could be a stay-at-home dad, but I make more money than the wife so I’m stuck for now. Help her become a famous blogger and then maybe I can stay home. 😉

Do you co-change dirty nappies? Even the very smelly ones?

Ugh, yes.

A little fairy gives you the possibility of breastfeeding? Are you going for it or do you run away?

Run away.

What is the one must-have item for a daddy?

Beer.

How many kids do you plan on having?

I’ve got two and that’s enough.

Lads’ nights? How often do you have them?

At least weekly after work … but wife goes out at least once a week too.

Your children’s favourite achievement?

Potty training. We’re aiming high for their future.

What is your best memory with your kid(s)?

The first time both of them ate ice cream together on holiday.

Name one thing you miss since being a daddy?

Sleep. Especially that lie-in on a Saturday. And then being able to spend the rest of the day in the pub watching rugby, and maybe not come home until Sunday.

Weight gain, before pregnancy, during, after and now? And we mean YOU DADDY, not the mummy!

Yes. I joined wife in eating all the things.

Dream holiday with your kids?

When they’re older, taking them to Universal Studios in Orlando and staying in the Hard Rock Hotel. Waking up to guitar music. The Hulk rollercoaster in the afternoon. Margaritaville for dinner.

Dream holiday without your kids or even without the other half? (You’re allowed to dream)

Skiing and apres-skiing.

How has your life changed since having kids?

We don’t have as much freedom and adventure, but the kids more than make up for it with cuddles and silliness. Our livers probably are very thankful to the kids as well.

Finish the sentence “It makes my heart melt when…”

my toddler says “Daddy” – one of the only words he knows so far.

Favourite beers brands and football team?

Brewdog beer. I prefer rugby to football and like the Harlequins.

Huggies or Pampers?

Pampers leak a lot less, in my experience.

Have you always wanted kids?

Yes (probably).

Best part of being a dad?

Minesweeping my kids’ dinner plates. I love eating their leftover food.

the Frenchie Mummy Blog
Diary of an imperfect mum

Blog Toast Tuesday: 13 September 2016

It’s time for my weekly feature, #blogtoast Tuesday, where I toast other blogs I’ve discovered and enjoyed in the previous week. I’m actually running a little late today. I like to queue up my #blogtoast post on Monday night and publish on my Tuesday morning commute. But last night I got my nails done instead. You gotta’ live a little, right?

So here I am blogging on my lunch break. I’m going to have to make it fast!

The Adventures of Beta Mummy: Doodlings and ramblings on what a f*cking disaster parenthood can be

Her blog’s subtitle just makes me feel safe. Yes, parenting can be a f*cking disaster. I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thinks so!

I’m also glad I’m not the only one who thinks an asterisk is the perfect way to write the f-word online. It’s like a swear, but not a swear. Nobody’s sure if it really counts as swearing. It’s Schrodinger’s swear.

Anyway, I love the concept of Beta Mummy, who just doesn’t look as polished and sorted as Alpha Mummy. Alpha Mummy attends all the playgroups perfectly coiffed and dressed, with no sick on her shoulder, and engages in sparklingly witty conversation with other Alpha Mummies. Beta Mummy comes rolling in late, with no money for the playgroup “fee” and some cheerios stuck in her hair. Beta Mummy illustrates these sorts of scenes with hilarious drawings.

But Beta Mummy knows that not all is as it appears – I love her post, ‘Even Alpha Mummies Struggle’.

She is also one of the hosts of the fab Chucklemums linky, where you can link up your funny posts. I’ve only linked up one that I thought was worthy, but someday I might write something vaguely funny again!

Little Paper Swans: A food + mama blog

A very different sort of blog – Little Paper Swans has beautiful photography and great lifestyle posts.

My favourite feature on her blog is her Weekly Meal Plans for under £30. I’m always struggling to come up with new ideas of things to cook without buying loads of ingredients or making loads of effort! She packages it up for you nicely so you can pick and choose what you might like to cook. You can get further inspiration from her great selection of recipes.

She also has a great series featuring other people’s birth stories. I really enjoy hearing about other people’s experiences.

Please do join me in toasting the best blogs by tweeting your favourite this week with the hashtag: #blogtoast (and if you @themumreviews I will retweet you – it’s win/win!) – or let me know just what you think of me in the comments!

Wearing pyjamas on the school run and looking awesome

In some of my more shameful moments of being a judge-y mum (it’s so wrong, but let’s face it, we all do it sometimes), I’ve enjoyed guffawing with my friends at the other mums I’ve seen doing the nursery/school run in their pyjamas. I mean, I know mornings are tough, but how hard is it to throw on a pair of jeans?

But it turns out that I am totally not down with the trends.

Apparently, wearing pyjamas in public is super on-trend in 2016, and all the celebs are doing it. Now, I’m not one to blindly follow fashion trends, but this is one I can definitely get behind. Looking fashionable in loose and comfy clothes … what’s not to like?

Unfortunately, most of my pyjamas are voluminous numbers from maternity days or nightgowns I’ve owned since I was 15. Not really the on-trend ones we’re talking about here. And the ones the celebs are wearing will set you back at least £200 for a set.

So I was excited and intrigued when The Reach London contacted me about their new Pyjama Kickstarter campaign. They’re raising funds to produce a range of affordable, luxury cotton pyjamas that you can totally leave the house in. My favourite is the Liberty London print (close up in featured photo), but they have a great range available:

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Why it’s a good brand to support

  • It’s a small London-based business that uses a London manufacturer. I love supporting local business and ethically produced products.
  • They use the same London factory that supplies top brands such as Victoria Beckham and Burberry.
  • They have high-quality craftmanship, which includes French seams, piped trim, hand-tailoring and ethically sourced mother-of-pearl buttons.
  • Their pyjamas are 100% high-quality soft cotton, which is machine washable. Some of the famous brands are dry clean only – and who wants to dry clean pyjamas?

Why the pyjamas are great to wearpyjamas_the-reach-london_pinterest

  • Unlike most luxury pyjamas on the market, it’s possible to buy the tops and bottoms separately. This is brilliant if you wear different sizes on the bottom and the top (many mums do after the things those babies did to your body).
  • The bottoms are available in two different lengths in case you’re short like me. And you can adjust the waistband to wear on your waist or hips depending on your preference.
  • You can just buy a top if you prefer to only wear a nightshirt with no bottoms.
  • It’s totally cool and on-trend to wear the tailored pyjama top with a pair of jeans.
  • Or you could wear a whole set with nice sandals and accessories. This would be great for holidays somewhere hot and sunny.

How to get your hands on some

  • If you support their Kickstarter campaign, you can be among the first to own these pyjamas. Not only will you be supporting small UK business, but also you will get special investor price.
  • Prices start from £45 for a pair of pyjama trousers. The Liberty set I’m lusting after is £105 – still reasonable for luxury pyjamas.
  • Shipping is free to anywhere in the world.
  • You don’t pay for the pyjamas until 1 October, and only if the Kickstarter campaign is successful. If they don’t reach their goal, they can’t make the pyjamas.

Do you like the pyjama prints available? Are you down with the idea of wearing really nice pyjamas on the school run? Please let me know in the comments!

Disclosure: I’m receiving a “bloggers discount” in return for this brand collaboration.

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday
Petite Pudding

Walk-away Alfredo Chicken and Broccoli recipe

Slow cookers are a fabulous timesaver, and one I use more and more as school runs and schedules get into full swing. This is a great back-to-school recipe that can be modified to suit your needs.

We’re a gluten-free household (when my husband’s home), so this recipe features an easy, homemade alfredo sauce that’s gluten free, and gluten-free pasta. You’re more than welcome to use your favourite pasta, and a jar of alfredo sauce, but this easy white sauce may make you think twice about all the other ingredients thrown in with jar sauces.

My kids are both in morning classes, so I use this recipe to start just after lunch time for dinner later (2.5 hours). If your schedule means you need to start it in the morning, go for LOW to allow 5 hours. If you find the pasta gets too mushy (GF pasta can usually handle it), cook the pasta separately 20 minutes before serving, and skip the chicken stock at the end.

You’ll need:

  • 3 boneless chicken breasts
  • ¼ cup chopped white onion (frozen is fine)
  • 1.5 cup frozen broccoli florets (about 6-8 big pieces, hard to measure)
  • ½ tsp garlic powder
  • ½ tsp black pepper
  • 1 tsp oregano
  • 2 cups double cream
  • ½ cup butter
  • 2 TB cream cheese
  • 1 cup grated parmesan
  • 1 tsp black pepper
  • 1 tsp basil pesto
  • 1 cube or 1 tsp concentrated chicken stock (GF)
  • 1.5-2 cups water
  • 340g/12oz penne pasta (GF)
  • salt and pepper to taste

The method:

First things first, give the slow cooker a bit of cooking spray, if you like, and spread the onions across the bottom of the pot.

Dice the chicken breasts into large cubes, trying to keep a similar size for uniform cooking. Spread the chicken cubes on the chopping board and shake on the oregano, black pepper and garlic powder before adding the spiced chicken to the pot.

Slow cooker alfredo prep
Layer in your broccoli, turn the cooker onto HIGH and cover
.

Next, I make the alfredo sauce, it takes about ten minutes total. You can opt for a jar, but this is really very simple.

Using a saucepan on a medium heat, I add the butter, cream cheese and cream.

Stir the butter and a cream cheese until smooth within the cream using a rubber spatula to clean the edges and bottom of the pan.

Add the pesto and mix into the cream before adding the grated cheese.

If you wanted to stop now, you could use this sauce over pasta any time, but for this recipe, we’re going to add the chicken stock for cooking the pasta.

Add the chicken stock with water to the alfredo sauce (I know – what? But trust me). You can mix the stock in a mug first, but I just mix in the concentrate and then top it off with the kettle, right there in the pan.

Turn off the heat once the mixture is smooth (a little oil displacement is fine).

Layer the uncooked pasta onto the broccoli, pour your sauce with stock into the cooker, covering the contents. If the pasta isn’t covered, stir the layers to bring the broccoli to the top, as it doesn’t need to be submerged. Add a little more water if you need to cover the pasta, but tread lightly.

If you prefer the jar option, I suggest mixing the alfredo with the chicken stock before adding it to the slow cooker.

Slow cooker alfredo just before turning it on

Top tip: For added flavour, add bacon bits to the recipe. I keep leftover bacon  (if there ever is any) after I’ve oven baked a tray full at 180C/375F for cooked breakfast.

Cover the cooker, and walk away. This will slowly grow over the next hour. If you happen to be home and walk by, feel free to push any stray noodles down, but by and large, this dish is happy to tick along in the background. It’ll be ready to serve after two hours if the chicken is smaller, 2.5 if larger chunks. Please be sure to check the chicken is cooked through; pressing it against the side of the pot with a spoon should break the chicken easily.

Turn off or onto warm after 2 hours (5 hours if LOW temperature setting) and enjoy! It’s an all in one, so scoop onto a plate or bowl whenever your family are ready to eat.

Slow cooker doing some slow cooking

This dish can be done in the oven as well, at 180C/375F in a deep dish with a cover, or tightly wrapped with foil. You’ll want to spray a non-stick or grease the pan, and may need to check and stir it after half an hour. Cut the chicken a bit smaller and it should be done in 45 min to an hour.
Sparkly Mummy

A Shrek Adventure with my big boy

Earlier this week I took my son on a day out in London on his last day before starting school. It was such a treat to go to London with just one child who doesn’t need a pushchair, bibs, bottles, purees or any other heavy equipment in order to enjoy the day.

The main attraction of the day was our trip to Shrek’s Adventure, and I thought I’d write a little review in case you’ve been wondering whether it was worth a trip.

The background

As you may know, the Shrek franchise is part of the DreamWorks film company. They are your leading alternative to Disney movies, and they do it well. I have loved Shrek since the first movie came out in 2001 – well before my kids were even a glimmer in my eye. I love the moral that you don’t need to be beautiful or popular to be a hero. And the snappy one-liners.

That must be Lord Farquaad’s castle … Do you think he’s maybe compensating for something?

Other DreamWorks films include Madagascar, Kung Fu Panda and (more recent but less well known) Home. All of them have great modern soundtracks and clever dialogue that the parents can enjoy too. One of my favourite ever film lines is from Kung Fu Panda:

There is no charge for awesomeness. Or attractiveness.

So this was one of those days out that was (selfishly?) just as much about me as it was about my son. I was giggling like a little girl the whole time.

The practical stuff

It is a bit expensive, but you can save money if you book in advance online. The online price is £18.90 per adult and £15.30 per child. shrek portraitThis is about on a par with other London attractions though, and well worth it considering the quality of the show.

I highly recommend booking well in advance if you’re going during half-term or other busy times. I had tried to go last half-term and there were no tickets available when I went online to book the day before. However, today, as some kids were already back to school, it was virtually empty – which was awesome.

It’s in a great location on the South Bank, close to Waterloo Station and next to other attractions such as Sea Life, the London Dungeons and the London Eye. If you want to see more than one thing, you can save money buying combi tickets.

The best bits

I obviously won’t give away all the details, as that would ruin the fun, but here are a few of our favourite bits.

The show starts out with a 4D bus ride. In case you’re unfamiliar with 4D, that’s where, on top of the film being in 3D, they do other stuff to make the environment seem realistic, like squirt water at you if you’re being splashed in the film. It wasn’t just any bus ride – it flies through the air from London to the Kingdom of Far Far Away. My son thought it was the coolest thing ever.

Rather than landing in Far Far Away, you crash there – for reasons I’ll keep a surprise – and then you are sent on a quest to find a way back home to London. Obviously, well-known characters from the Shrek franchise will be there to help or hinder you.

You wander through a series of realistic fairytale sets, and actors play the Shrek characters. There is also a bit of direct audience participation, and it’s all very silly with lots of gross-out humour. It really is entertainment for the whole family.  It’s a little piece of theme park magic.

At the enPhoto with Shrekd of your quest, you get to meet a real live Shrek and take pictures with him using your own camera. This is so nice because it would be very easy for a place like this to insist the only photos you get are the ones they try to sell you.

The staff were so lovely as well. When we got to the Shrek photo opportunity bit, my phone (which I’d turned off because I <always> follow the rules) was taking AGES to boot up. I went to the end of the photo queue and it was still booting when I got to the front. The woman working there let me stand off to the side for as long as it took (it must have been at least 15 minutes), and then come back when I was ready, so we wouldn’t miss out. This was beyond the call of duty and I really appreciated it.

While we were waiting, a giant King Julien (from Madagascar) had a dance party with my son.

I like to move it, move it!

After we finally got our Shrek photo, we came out into an area that had loads of bits from the other Dreamworks movies, with cool things you could pose with for photos, and a Kung Fu Panda computer game. We stayed in this area for ages and, again, no one rushed us along, which was great.

kung-fu-pandaFinally, we came out into the bit where they try to sell you pictures they took of you during the show. These had been taken in front of a green screen and they were actually really good quality. I have to admit to being suckered in.

We got a ‘Far Far Away travel journal’ with all of our pictures in, and stories and activities related to the movies. It also came with a keyring and magnet with our pictures in, and you are able to download the photos for use online. It was £25, but it was a really special day and I’m happy with spending this for the memories. My son has wanted to read his travel journal before bed every night.

The verdict

I think this is the most exotic adventure you can have with a young child in London. The website says children under 6 might be too afraid at this attraction, but my son is 4 and is very sensitive, and he was totally fine. It’s definitely worth a visit if you like theme parks, Dreamworks movies and/or adventure!

For the avoidance of doubt, this is not a sponsored review. I paid my own way!

The Pramshed

Not feeling sad on my son’s first day at school

I can’t resist jumping on the bandwagon and writing a starting school post. My big boy started school today. I expected to feel a bit sad because my baby is growing up, but I didn’t really feel sad at all. I’m wondering if I’m feeling the wrong thing!

We’re used to being apart. He’s been going to a childminder, nursery or preschool pretty regularly since he was 10 months old. So actually, for us, school is going to make very little difference to how much time we spend together. I felt so many things today, but none of them were sad.

More than anything, I felt proud. Proud as he ran away from me towards the school gates, full of confidence and excitement about his new adventure – not the least bit scared.

I felt excited. I’m so excited to face all of the new challenges ahead.

I felt geeky – because I’m totally looking forward to helping him with his homework.

I felt insecure. I want the other parents and the teachers and school staff to like me!

I felt worried. Will my son behave? Will he make friends? Will he be happy at this school?

I felt guilty – because I didn’t feel sad at all. I’ve got free childcare and a new way to relate to my son.

Babies are cute and cuddly, but I wanted to have kids because I’m just a big kid myself. I remember the kid stuff: kid’s films, kid’s food, kid’s games – lots of silly stuff. Now my eldest is in school, he will start enjoying things that I can still enjoy myself. If that is a little bit selfish, then you can judge me all you please.

As it turns out, my son was perfectly happy about his school day. He wouldn’t tell me much about it though. He said it was a secret.

His teacher told me that his behaviour was “challenging”. He needs to work on sharing and doing what he’s told. I’ve never been very good at doing what I was told either. But I won’t let him get away with it. He can be better than me.

We rounded off the day by dancing like total goofballs in the living room to some of our favourite songs. We left the curtains open so any passerby could witness our foolishness.

The baby days are gone for my big boy, but the fun has just begun.

My Random Musings

Blog Toast Tuesday: 6 September 2016

It’s time for my weekly feature, #blogtoast Tuesday, where I toast other blogs I’ve discovered and enjoyed in the previous week. I toast them like you do with champagne, not like what you do to bread, just to be clear.

I have been featuring 3 blogs every week, but that’s getting to be too much for my brain. At least it is for me tonight. So I’m only featuring two this week.

We’ve had a really tiring weekend:

  • We ordered our new kitchen for our new extension that’s being built. That was a nerve-wracking expensive purchase, full of lots of decision-making.
  • We moved my 22-month-old from his cot to a big boy bed. Someday he might even sleep in it – he certainly didn’t last night.
  • And we dealt with a wicked nit invasion. I’d never had or seen lice before so I found that pretty stressful!

So I think you might see a theme for this week’s post – two blogs with recent posts about staying calm!

Mindful Mummy Mission

I discovered this blog tonight while participating in the #EatSleepBlogRT linky. She was a featured blogger on Petite Pudding’s newbie showcase. I thought her featured post on mindfulness for mums and dads offered a really realistic approach to parenting. It sets goals but keeps in mind all of the challenges life puts in the way.

I have to admit that I have never thought seriously about mindfulness – it all sounded a bit hippy-dippy to me – but her site is very convincing about it. Her About page discusses the scientific evidence that points to mindfulness being healthy for body and mind. She also explains how it is easier to put into practice during our busy daily lives than you might think. And her tone of writing is down to earth and not even slightly worthy or preachy. She has changed the way I think about mindfulness and I’m going to make more effort to incorporate it into my life.

I also really liked her post about mindfulness for bloggers – it’s so easy to let blogging and social media take over your life!

alifeinpracticeblog.com

I first found this blog in the #KCACOLS Facebook group. She posted ‘Negative Automatic Thoughts, Part 1: What on earth are NATs?‘ I had never heard of NATs before, and I’m surprised about that. It should be something people are talking about. Feelings of inadequacy that intrude on your life and cause anxiety must be something that affects a lot of people. I can certainly see some of these symptoms in myself. And giving a name to this, instead of just passing it off as no big deal, can be a step towards coping with it.

I also enjoyed her post about ‘Finding Your Calm Button‘. It’s about finding the one thing that can calm and centre you when you feel your day and your thoughts are spiralling out of control. When I was younger and used to live in the USA, I would go for a drive to calm down. Now I live in the UK, that sounds like a silly idea! Driving here seems like much harder work – or maybe I’ve just realised that getting behind the wheel when you’re upset probably isn’t the best course of action. On the weekend when I was freaking out about lice, I stopped and had a cup of tea – I’ve obviously been well assimilated into British culture. But I am going to think about another way to calm myself when caffeine isn’t at hand!

Please do join me in toasting the best blogs by tweeting your favourite this week with the hashtag: #blogtoast (and if you @themumreviews I will retweet you – it’s win/win!) – or let me know just what you think of me in the comments!

 

 

 

 

 

Have a baby, keep your job: Tips for standing up for your maternity rights at work

Last week, MPs urged better job protection for expectant and new mothers and #pregnancydiscrimination trended on Twitter. It trended because thousands of women read the news story, nodded their heads and said, ‘that happened to me’. It happened to me despite my employer being in all other ways lovely. It happened to me even though I’m sure it wasn’t intentional. It happened to me even though I’ve never been the type to lay down and take unfair treatment. It blindsided me.

And, like thousands of women, I didn’t fight back. I needed my job – not only for the money, but also because I was emotionally invested in my career. I was afraid to “make a fuss”. And, like thousands of women, even now I won’t speak up about the specifics of what happened in this public forum, in the worry it would further harm my career. Even sharing these few words make me worry about it.

Pregnancy discrimination – troubling statistics

Here are just a few of the troubling facts about women’s experiences of employment discrimination before, during and after pregnancy.

  • A government report found 77% of mothers felt they had a negative and/or discriminatory experience related to pregnancy, maternity leave and returning to work (compared to 45% a decade ago).
  • The same report found that 51% of mothers who had their flexible working request approved felt it resulted in negative consequences.
  • Surveys have shown that more than half of working mums have had their flexible working request turned down.
  • In order to raise concerns at a tribunal, you need to pay £1200, and there is a 3-month time-limit for making a claim.

Standing up for your employment rights

If you’re a pregnant woman worrying about the future of her career, or a woman on maternity leave trying to make arrangements to return to work whilst managing the nightmare of childcare, or a woman who already feels she’s been poorly treated at work just because she had a baby, here are some tips and resources for standing up for yourself.

When you’re pregnant at work

  • If you’re feeling okay during the first trimester, try to get pay rises, promotions or assignments to important projects sorted as much as possible before you announce your pregnancy. You are not legally obligated to tell your employer until 15 weeks before the beginning of the week your baby’s due.
  • On the other hand, if you’re feeling very unwell in the first trimester, you should tell your manager. It is illegal for you to receive any unfavourable treatment as a result of time off or breaks taken due to pregnancy-related illness. There is more information on this pregnancy sickness support website.
  • If you are eligible to join a union in your profession, join the union now if you haven’t already. They will give you support and legal advice if things go wrong later. Sometimes, being a member of a union will save you from trouble in the first place. I wish I had joined my union before my first pregnancy.
  • You are entitled to paid time off for antenatal appointments.
  • If you experience a miscarriage, you are entitled to paid sick leave and no unfavourable treatment. You may also be entitled to paid sick leave if you experience an exceptionally traumatic pregnancy. If you experience a stillbirth or neonatal death, you are entitled to all of your maternity leave and rights. The Working Families website has a useful summary of your pregnancy bereavement rights.

All about maternity leave

  • The Citizens Advice Bureau offers a great summary of your maternity leave rights, including when it can start and how long it lasts.
  • If you are keen to return to work after your baby, please (Please!!) use your Keeping in Touch Days. These are 10 days when you can go to work to keep up to speed with what’s going on, without ending your maternity leave. You are entitled to receive full pay for these days! More importantly, I think these days can help you maintain your confidence about working and help your employer realise you are serious about returning. I didn’t use them with my first baby, and I regret it. I used a few during my second maternity leave, and they made me so happy. I brought baby with me and breastfed him during meetings. His burps really made a strong contribution to the proceedings.

Returning to work and requesting flexible and/or part-time working

If you’ve sailed through being pregnant at work and maternity leave, this is the stage that might just trip you up. It’s where me and many of my friends have gotten a few metaphorical scraped knees and bruises. Knowing your rights is half the battle.

  • I know people who’ve been made redundant upon trying to return after maternity leave. Scrutinise this. If there is a programme of general redundancies, that may be legitimate, but beware of being singled out. If you are, it’s probably illegal.
  • If you’ve been employed at your workplace for more than 26 weeks, you have a right to request flexible working. This could involve part-time hours, flexible hours or home-working.
  • If you have a meeting with your employer to discuss your flexible working request, it is considered good practice to allow you to bring a union representative or work colleague along to the meeting to back you up. I encourage you to do this.
  • They cannot turn your request down unless they have a sound business reason, such as extra expense or not being able to do it during non-standard hours. Please question them if they turn you down, and consider an appeal as explained in the link above. I know people who’ve asked to work 8am-4pm instead of 9-5, and been turned down, despite it not being a customer-facing role or time-sensitive in any way. This is bullshit. Fight it.
  • If your request is accepted, it should not involve any drop in status or pay. Part-time and flexible workers are entitled to the same promotion prospects, incremental pay rises and other employment benefits as full-time workers. Acas has further advice about this and a free helpline for any employment rights questions.

Pregnancy, birth and motherhood can change you in so many ways, it’s super unfair that we still have to fight for our jobs when we’ve been through so much. Maternity can knock your confidence, and we deserve support and equal treatment.

If your employer has given you the shaft in circumstances related to your pregnancy and birth, fight it! Here is some info about taking action against discrimination at work. However, I totally understand that having a baby is hard enough and you might not be up for a legal battle. At the very least, check out Pregnant then Screwed for advice, and tell them your story anonymously to help their campaign.

Did your employer give you the shaft for having a baby? How did you deal with it? 

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

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