The Christmas Tag – couldn’t resist!

Okay I know I said I was going to stop blogging for Christmas, but this isn’t a blog post, it’s a Christmas tag. My lovely friend over at Me, You, Baby Too tagged me and it simply seemed rude to say no. You should pop over and check out her blog – she is very funny!

So this post is just a bit of fun and doesn’t involve me being creative. Let’s face it. I’m addicted to the internet. I needed to do some internetting today. I promise I’ll get better. But for now…here’s my Christmas Tag interview.

WHAT’S YOUR FAVOURITE CHRISTMAS MOVIE?

For me it’s not Christmas if you haven’t seen some version of A Christmas Carol. I’m not that keen on the Jim Carrey one. I like either A Muppet Christmas Carol or the straight-to-DVD one starring Patrick Stewart. Patrick Stewart is the perfect Scrooge.

HAVE YOU EVER HAD A WHITE CHRISTMAS?

When I was little I lived somewhere that used to get very snowy indeed. Sometimes there would even be so much snow you had to dig your way out of the front door. I’m not sure if that much snow ever happened on Christmas day, but all the Christmases were definitely white. In adult life, not so much, but I do think one Yorkshire Christmas had enough snow (or was it on Boxing Day?) that I managed a snowball fight with my nieces.

WHERE DO YOU USUALLY SPEND YOUR HOLIDAY?

In Yorkshire with my husband’s family. There are 18 of us when we all get together!

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE CHRISTMAS SONG?

‘Fairytale of New York’ because I like the sort of Irish-y tune paired with depressing lyrics.

DO YOU OPEN ANY PRESENTS ON CHRISTMAS EVE?

Not usually. But this year I’m letting my kids open some presents from friends and neighbours early. We have loads of presents from us to lug up to Yorkshire so I don’t want to take the other presents as well. Saving everything for Christmas Day is overrated IMHO.

CAN YOU NAME ALL OF SANTA’S REINDEER?

Dasher, Prancer, Donner, Vixen, Rudolph, um…nope.

WHAT HOLIDAY TRADITIONS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS YEAR?

Having a drink and chatting with family!

IS YOUR CHRISTMAS TREE REAL OR FAKE?

Real. I wouldn’t mind a fake myself but my husband wouldn’t stand for one.

WHAT’S YOUR ALL TIME FAVOURITE HOLIDAY TREAT/FOOD/SWEET?

We always have our main Christmas dinner at lunchtime or late afternoon. Then, later, we have Christmas supper. This consists of lots of cheese, chutney, pickles, Yorkshire pork pies and the likes. I love this munchey meal with a glass of port.

BE HONEST, DO YOU LIKE GIVING OR RECEIVING GIFTS BETTER?

It depends on the person I’m giving to. There are some people that are fun to shop for and are then grateful for their gift. In that case, it’s great I’d rather be the giver. But sometimes people are hard to shop for and not very appreciative, which is not so much fun.

WHAT IS THE BEST CHRISTMAS PRESENT YOU HAVE EVER RECEIVED?

That’s a tough one. I don’t think anything has ever quite beat the excitement of receiving a ‘Barbie Dream House’ on Christmas when I was about 6. I don’t think adult gifts can ever really compare! But I do love getting a spa voucher. You can let everyone know.

WHAT WOULD BE YOUR DREAM PLACE TO VISIT FOR THE HOLIDAY SEASON?

I would actually quite like to just be in my own house and have family come to me. It might be stressful but we have never been in our own house on Christmas day before.

ARE YOU A PRO PRESENT WRAPPER OR DO YOU FAIL MISERABLY?

I fail miserably. This year, my husband wrapped and I was in charge of handing him pieces of tape and writing the gift tags.

WHAT MADE YOU REALISE THE TRUTH ABOUT SANTA?

I always knew the truth.

WHAT MAKES THE HOLIDAYS SPECIAL FOR YOU?

Wine. Oh and probably my family. Wine and my family together.

I’m not good at thinking of who would like to be tagged for this sort of thing, so if you’d like to participate just let me know in the comments!

Christmas Carols: A parenting minefield

One of my favourite bits of the bedtime routine is singing to my children. I always sing at least one song to each of my sons before they go to sleep. My eldest usually chooses a song now that he knows my full repertoire, but during the festive season his only guideline is that I sing Christmas songs.

There aren’t a lot of Christmas songs that I know by heart, and even with those I’m probably getting the lyrics wrong. But either way, I find my inner monologue while singing these songs to my son ever so slightly troubling. I worry about what exactly do these lyrics mean and are they really sending appropriate messages to a 4 year old?

Okay, so it’s not a really serious worry. Certainly not big enough for me to stop singing them. But I thought it might be amusing to take a look at some of the weirdest Christmas song lyrics out there.

Santa Claus is Coming to Town

He sees you when you’re sleeping
He knows when you’re awake

My son pegged this one the other day. “How does Santa Claus see me when I’m sleeping?” I told him it was “magic”. He seemed to accept it. But how creepy is that? No wonder my children look slightly worried in their Christmas photo, if they think they’re meeting the fat bearded man with odd dress sense who has been watching them all night long – ALL YEAR.

Family photo with Father Christmas.jpg

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

Without quoting the lyrics directly, we all know the story of this song. All the mean bully reindeer laughed at poor Rudolph because he had a stupid big red nose. They wouldn’t let him join in their reindeer games (whatever those might be – maybe antler ring toss – Rudolph probs wasn’t missing much).

But then, when suddenly Rudolph gets some extra accolades from the big boss (Santa), and becomes the manager of the Sleigh Guidance Department, all the reindeer “loved” him. The bastard suck ups. I worry that this song is teaching my son that it’s okay to be a shallow arse-licker who bullies people until they want something from them.

Winter Wonderland

My son said the other day that this is his favourite Christmas song. I guess he just likes the tune. I worry about the old-fashioned sentiments.

In the meadow we can build a snowman
Then pretend that he is Parson Brown
He’ll say, “Are you married?”
We’ll say, “No man”
But you can do the job, when you’re in town

What? So this couple is walking around in the snow, they decide to build a snowman, and then they decide to pretend he’s a priest? How random is that? Is it actually both members of the couple, or just one of them trying to propose in an entirely creepy way? “Look, Parson Brown the religious snowman wants us to stop living in sin. What do you say, babes?”

I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas

I’m not actually worried about my son’s reaction to this one. We both know we’re talking about snow. But the whole time I’m singing this, I can’t help but think of racists. I’m dreaming of a white Christmas, just like the ones I used to know. I mean, why don’t you still know white Christmases if you used to have them all the time? Did you move from Finland to Spain? Or are you just a member of the alt-right and speaking in thinly veiled innuendo? It just makes me think of some of the worrisome politics we are facing today, even though that’s obviously not what the song is about.

We Wish You a Merry Christmas

This one is pleasant enough, until it gets to the bit about figgy pudding. Bring us some figgy pudding. Please bring some right now! We won’t go until we get some. Bugger off, you spoiled brats. Where are your parents? Get your own figgy pudding.

Silent Night

This one is lovely and soothing. It is definitely one of my favourites. But I have to admit to cringing a bit at the round yon virgin bit. What if the boy asks me, “Mummy, what’s a virgin?” And what do I tell him? Maybe a young, unmarried woman? But that could backfire. He might go around calling people virgins. “My cousin is only 16. She’s a virgin.” But I can’t tell him what it actually means! It’s a minefield. I’ll just mumble the virgin part and hope he doesn’t notice. Round yon mm-mm-mm, mother and child!

What are your favourite Christmas carols? Do any of them have slightly dodgy lyrics?

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday
Petite Pudding