How to become something you never thought you would be

It's not too late to be brand new

Does anyone else remember being about 18 years old (or even younger) and thinking they had the world all figured out?

Did anyone else think they were complete at that stage? “I’m an adult now and this is who I am.”

Maybe it was just me. But boy was I wrong. Now I’m in my late 30s, I’m finally starting to realise that I’m becoming a new person all the time – that I’m not complete and that it’s never too late to become something you never thought you would be.

I think at my age it’s easy to feel a bit discouraged about your prospects – like it’s getting too late to learn something new or succeed at something you never tried before. But then I need to remind myself of how much I’ve changed since I was 18. Since then I have:

  • Moved to a whole foreign country and learned to live happily in a different culture
  • Built a pretty decent career-like thing that I’m not ashamed to talk about at dinner parties (in case I ever go to any).
  • Grew two humans and learned how to keep them alive.

And those are just the really big things.

At the same time, a fear of failure has all too often kept me from success. I have a history of being a quitter. If anything seemed too hard – or the prospect of success too good to be true – or it seemed that failure was imminent, I would just give up while the giving up was good. It happened with just about every sport or hobby I ever tried. It also happened with a few career choices I pursued in my youth. I was going to be a star of screen or stage but I never even actually tried that.

I’ve told myself I enjoy being a jack of all trades, but really I’m afraid I can’t be the master of any of them. And fear never did me any favours (I have to remind myself when undergoing any medical procedure that fainting does not help). Strictly Ballroom had the best ever mantra:

A life lived in fear.jpg

That’s why this blogging lark has become so important to me. I’m not going to give up on this one. Some weeks it’s hard. I can’t think of anything to write, or nobody is reading what I do write. Some days, being a mum and all, I’m just so tired and I want to stare into space and drink a glass of wine. Today is one of those days.

But I’m going to write instead. Because sometimes the feelings that make me feel like sitting around doing nothing are actually put to better use by writing. I can write it all down and put it to rest.

Writing is one of the things I’ve always loved but was too scared to properly pursue – especially fiction writing. The blog is teaching me that I can write and that writing isn’t always about who is going to read it, or whether I become famous or even recognised at all.

It is also teaching me that it’s never too late to reinvent yourself. I can be a mum, a wife, a friend, a blogger, and a writer. You can finally go and climb that mountain you’ve been looking at, or take steps towards changing your career to the one you really want.

You’re never too old (or too young) or not good enough.

Not too late.jpg

Have you given up on things you loved before? Is there something you always wanted to try?

Tammymum
Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

Author: The Mum Reviews

Writing about women's health and wellness (especially for mums) as I try to stay sane in my crazy life.

36 thoughts on “How to become something you never thought you would be”

  1. Oh I totally get what you are saying. I’m having a bit of a wobble at the moment, 37 soon and starting to panic a bit that I still haven’t got my shit together.

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  2. ive been blogging since June and feel like ive kind of hit a wall in the last few weeks. am so tempted to give up ,but at the same time so determined not to

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      2. It happens to all of us. I find it helps to just write down whatever shit is in my head, not necessarily planning on publishing it. Like flushing the system!

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  4. With the exception of living in a foreign country this post could be about me, right down to the fiction writing. I have always let fear get the better of me but blogging is really helping me with that x
    #FamilyFun

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  5. Absolutely love this post – you are so right that writing somehow helps us be who we want to be (even when we’re juggling so many things). Am so pleased you’re not giving up on blogging as I LOVE your posts – you write beautifully and ‘get’ life and all it throws at us. xx #familyfun

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  6. I appreciate the positivity in your post. I really do. I am 37 and a sahm…not a life I had envisioned at 18. I have always been an ambitious career-oriented person and I have hopes that I will get a job soon but then I worry about not making the most of the time I DO have with my babies now. Never a win. #familyfun

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  8. Oh I could have written this myself! I’ve always done the second rate job because it’s easy. I’m blogging and this is something I don’t plan on giving up! I need to make it work for me! Thanks for linking up to #familyfun

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  9. I totally get what you’re saying. I am basically the same! I perpetually feel close to quitting with blogging too, but will keep going for now! #KCACOLS

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  10. I’m another person who tends to give up when things get tough! But this past few months I’ve decided to turn it around and focus on positive things for a change; and writing a blog is definitely one of those! It’s all about thinking positively! #KCACOLS

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  12. Oh this is great. It’s so spot on too, it’s never to late. I agree with you I think fear as held me back with a lot of things and o give up before I’ve given myself chance. That’s what’s so great about blogging because I haven’t and I haven’t let the fear get the better of me – like you. So let’s keep going and kick some blogging butt. Thanks for sharing with us at #familyfun xx

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  13. We can always reinvent and do anything we want, blogging is an amazing fix for me and a relaxing pass time. It’s great to start things new, I cant wait till I get the urge to go to pottery classes, I know it will happen and I’m going to go overboard and fill every spare spare with bits of tat pottery and love it!:)

    Mainy

    #KCACOLS

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  14. I have given up on many many things but this year I had to give up on my marriage and not I feel I have nothing left to lose so next year is about becoming whatever I want to be! #KCACOLS

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  15. Now that I am a single mum, also in my late 30s, I’ve come to realise that life isn’t about reaching a stage when you’ve got all of your shit together. Shit mastery and togetherness is a nirvana that we will never reach because life has a great ability to throw more stuff at you (both good and bad). Life is about choosing the shit you want in your life and grabbing it by the horns and doing everything you want with it, and then trying not to let the rest of the shit throw you off course. Thanks for your post and sorry for the expletive comment. Pen x #KCACOLS

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  17. Love this, I started my blog. A few ,months gao and have been a bit rubbish but reading other blogs and chatting to other mums is fantastic and helps so much! Totally with you on the changing. I think we have probably all changed since becoming mummies which means there isn’t plenty of room to reinvent ourselves! off to follow your blog!!! 😀👍 #eatsleepBLOGRT

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